Why Formula One is so Straight it’s Gay

(Photo by Dan Istitene – Formula 1/Formula 1 via Getty Images)

As a self-proclaimed bisexual bimbo with a tendency for heterophobia, sports have never been specifically my cup of tea (unless it was dance or something gay like that). This year, however, Formula One has captured my camp little brain’s attention and I am literally obsessed now.

From the champagne celebrations to the expensive cars, F1 is so extra, and it typically has majority male viewers, which is surprising to me because if you think of stereotypical straight male hobbies and attributes, extravagance is rare, but realistically who cares? In my opinion, sexuality shouldn’t specifically impact your interests, so I say go off queen.

I genuinely think that motorsport could be a unifier for the gays and the straights – disclaimer for the gays by motorsport I mean F1, not the song although Nicki’s verse does slap. Anyway, there’s nothing I enjoy more than seeing a straight male genuinely just enjoy themselves without fear of being shamed for lack of masculinity or some bullshit like that. Watching the F1 with my straight besties without a care in the world and sipping my porn star martinis is one of my many joys in life, I will not lie. Anyways enough of the gay shit lets chit chat some drivers.

I am first and foremost a raging Ferrari/Charles Leclerc stan, (I promise it’s not just because he’s good looking) and seeing him spin out in Imola last week and finishing P6 was like the same feeling I got when Bimini didn’t win Drag Race Season 2. No need for a nervy B though because he’s still in the lead points-wise.

Another one of my favourite drivers Sebastien Vettel who drives for Aston Martin did so well last weekend finishing P8, and gaining more points for Aston Martin which is rare. Vettel is a seasoned and brilliant driver, a 4-time World Champion in fact, but also, he’s such a sweet man. Last year at the Saudi Arabia Grand Prix, as a mini gesture he sported a rainbow flag inspired, LGBTQ converse and a same love t-shirt. It was like a mini protest against the anti-LGBT laws in Saudi Arabia and Hungary.

(Photo by FLORION GOGA / POOL / AFP) (Photo by FLORION GOGA/POOL/AFP via Getty Images)

Vettel really said ALLY and I live for it! And don’t even get me started on his friendship with Mick Schumacher (Haas driver and Ferrari reserve driver) they’re so wholesome! They have like a fun uncle and nephew type vibe even in the competitive nature of F1.

Another driver I was impressed with last weekend was Lando Norris(McLaren). Norris finished P3 after starting P5 and put up a good fight against Leclerc gaining points. It’s always nice to see McLaren on pole as even though Daniel Ricciardo won Monza last year, McLaren hadn’t won anything since Jenson Button’s win in Brazil in 2012. You could consider them underdogs and, of course, everyone loves an underdog.

If you’ve actually made it this far through my slightly comprehensive spiel of hot takes on F1 as a sport and the culture around it, I would say well done. For those who don’t understand some references look them up in the gay dictionary (for my hetero counterparts, the gay dictionary is not actually a real thing please don’t try to look it up). I hope this can act as a little introduction for many more gals and gays to get into F1.  

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